{"id":298,"date":"2019-08-24T12:09:13","date_gmt":"2019-08-24T12:09:13","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/onyx23.net\/beats\/?p=298"},"modified":"2019-08-24T12:09:13","modified_gmt":"2019-08-24T12:09:13","slug":"results-not-typical","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/2019\/08\/24\/results-not-typical\/","title":{"rendered":"Results Not Typical"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t understand Slim-Fast<br \/>\ntheir commercials show &#038; state<br \/>\nfat people losing weight<br \/>\nbut the results aren&#8217;t typical<br \/>\nexcuse me, but I thought the whole reason<br \/>\nfor drinking Slim-Fast was to lose weight<br \/>\ncome to think of it<br \/>\nthat fine print finds its way<br \/>\ninto a lot of commercials these days<br \/>\ntake Jared and his army of obese friends<br \/>\neating those Subway subs under 6 grams<br \/>\nof fat<br \/>\nso what the hell man<br \/>\nif losing weight by eating fat free subs<br \/>\nand drinking Slim-Fast isn&#8217;t typical<br \/>\nwhy should I even bother?<br \/>\nya know, that shit taste like shit<br \/>\nso that&#8217;s why I stick with fries and whoppers<br \/>\nyeah, I know all about diet and exercise<br \/>\nnot falling for those media lies<br \/>\nsee I believe that no matter what I eat<br \/>\nor what I drink<br \/>\nnothing is going to help me lose weight<br \/>\nas long as I lounge around<br \/>\ninside my house, wearing yesterday&#8217;s underwear<br \/>\nand memorizing every question from Jeopardy reruns<br \/>\nI think as long as I keep running 3 miles a day<br \/>\nand playing hockey 2 times a week<br \/>\nI can live off bacon and beer<br \/>\nnever gaining an unwanted ounce for the rest of my life<br \/>\nbut legally I must warn you<br \/>\nabout my bacon and beer diet plan<br \/>\nthe results are not typical<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I don&#8217;t understand Slim-Fast their commercials show &#038; state fat people losing weight but the results aren&#8217;t typical excuse me, but I thought the whole reason for drinking Slim-Fast was<a href=\"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/2019\/08\/24\/results-not-typical\/\" class=\"more-link\"><span class=\"readmore\">Continue reading<span class=\"screen-reader-text\">Results Not Typical<\/span><\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[4],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-298","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-strange"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/298","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/1"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=298"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/298\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=298"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=298"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/onyx23.net\/inthebeat\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=298"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}